The idea of writing this came to me spontaneously, by itself. Thinking about the eternal search for the best share, “good where we are not”, about abroad. A dozen replaced jobs for 2 years, different kinds of activities, different places, different people. Different level of responsibility and remuneration. Different reasons for leaving.
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… Rain outside the window, in front of me on the table of a mug of hot tea without sugar and now there are no sweets. I’m weaning. It’s hard for me – my sweet weakness is all 21 years of life, but you have to change. You can’t let everything go by itself – otherwise “a mortgage for half a century, Ford focus on credit, a fat wife, a son – a dawn, a dacha” – the outcome is predictable. You need to train the standing of character. Refuse sweets, I have been holding on for 6 days. Start running in the morning-this morning was the 3rd time. There are no other bad habits. And you need to do something with work, change yourself, your attitude to many things regarding not only work, become more active, do not let you sit on the neck “by kindness of sincere”, and prioritize.
The text will be long, in some places tedious, and very subjective. Everyone sees the world in his own. My eyes are my eyes.
Let’s start.
Part One – "All by adult"
Reference point – May 2011.
Moving from the outskirts of the city (I prefer to remain incognito) to the center, the divorce of parents, the 19th anniversary, the first real work, a lot of ideas, desire, gleam in the eyes. Then I am from a dashing street Zhigan (not to be confused with a gopnik, I really didn’t offend the weak ones), always confident and my abilities, began to pup into something slippery, sticky, a creature without a name, sex and character. Superbuilding attitude to the authorities, the most presumptuous honest, always and everywhere ready as a sailor. You need to work without lunch – of course, everything for the office! I got sick – you are a man, 38.7 No reason to stay in a bed! The salary is small – you have no experience or skills, a student! Say thanks, you know how many of them are in your place?
I will immediately make a reservation that I have never been to the Jopopoliz, but at that moment I mentally, inside myself, sank even lower – I never played before the leadership, but for an incomprehensible reason I just became anyone, a sort of Japanese employees, ready for the first word of the boss to make myself a harakiri. I did not give a damn about himself, having wrapped his priorities. Boss – God, I am a bug.
This is what is called a slave mentality. Lost yourself. I don’t give a damn. Speech harassment "I am the last letter of the alphabet". Everything for others that remains – so be it, you can take yourself. The boss – according to Dafolt, the essence of divine nature, several times smarter than you only because he/she is the boss, and older than you.
At heart, realizing the whole comic of the current situation, I still tried to convince myself that I was “wow”, now a little more, and the world would fall at my feet. I’m all such … But with the gestation to the now unloved work of himself, in spite of all the attitudes, I stuffed it deeper into the ass and again in a circle ..
Part two – "New Life from Monday"
This could not last forever – two diametrically opposite entities got along in me for about six months, periodically casting in the internal conflict and permanent depression. In the end, changing 2 works in 2011, and having stayed on both sort of slugs I could not endure.
Shortly before the New Year, my application for dismissal fell on the table to the authorities, exactly after the corporate party. I think there was a critical shift there – I overcame the complexes and began to dance famously as I knew how to without looking at my "wooden" plastic. For the first time in 19 years. 19 years of serious mines and stereotypes "Men do not dance" and other things. It was fun.
Then the meeting of the New Year in a home environment, the “traditional” post -day ruin – prostitutes, taverns, a couple of times “Pati on the hut” – at that time there was a trash. I don’t want it anymore.
Then there were a march – shots from extreme to extreme – instead of “at least such work”, the plate replaced “Yes, to hell, I will work less than N money, and even no more than 8 hours a day”.
The result – 3 winter months of degrading in four walls of a warm cozy apartment, the route devoured – lifted – into the bed, with the constant “I’ll find work tomorrow”, the accumulation of negativity, debts and fat on the waist, reproached looks of my mother.
He was cut for days in the Pirate Left 4 Dead, looked at the South Park, and Karmadrozdi here. Along the way, the brain corroded the introduction to the series of films “The Spirit of Time”, the author of which skillfully juggles with facts, mixing the truth and speculation in one deck, and yellow articles about the fact that America is going to attack Russia, drink all the vodka, fuck all the virgins, implant all people on the planet of microchips and, ultimately, make Obama True – black lord.
Perhaps this is called a "middle -aged crisis", in which case we can assume that I have been ill with a lightweight form and from now on I have immunity.
With the advent of spring, it became more and more difficult to sit in four walls for obvious reasons, and I smoked my brave carcass, which sang everywhere in the hostile outside world in search of "at least some work".
At least some work was the position of a waiter, which, according to my stereotypes, was also “not kids”. However, there was nowhere to go, my mother was terribly a shame, I did not want to feel a chemist, and I humbled myself. The change of lifestyle, slightly rising self -esteem, warm weather, the abundance of pretty girls and the subsequent debauchery with one of them gave me new forces. The crisis retreated ..
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Part Three – "Search for the present itself"
At some point, awareness came to me clearly – I’m wasting time. It just passes without bringing any fruit. Why? "What you sow, you will reap". I didn’t sow anything. I was pleased with the availability of work, which protected me from the thought “I am not sitting on my neck”, the weekend with rare exceptions all also lifted up at the computer on the Internet, occasionally getting into crowded places with friends.
Then I was 20. I thought – and what? From the age of 16, I have stopped feeling the course of time. For example – yesterday I was 16, then 17, adulthood, and t. D. There is no longer the child’s sensation that time stretches unbearably when you have been waiting for a birthday or New Year for so long. Time rushed at the speed of Dzhumshutka, lagging behind the schedule, only gaining momentum, but I did nothing. At all. No aspirations, if only a day off, to be at a visit, the Internet is all my leisure. This is akin to drug addiction, unless it flies into a penny and does not hit health.
More and more often, thoughts like “Time will fly, so all youth will pass, I will stay with nothing. "
From that moment the curve of my independence began slowly, but confidently crawl up. I signed up in the gym, began to walk with friends more often. At the same time, the old I began to return, the former confidence in his voice appeared, began to stand on his own without inner reflection, completely sincerely, and not pushing himself with mentally “I already decided, I will do it”.
***
Conflict with the authorities, no requests for a chance, leaving his head proudly raised, since the comrade called to work, new impressions and still warming soul “No, I found a better place” when calculating.
Thanks to that comrade, I almost pulled me with me to the pool with me. During 3 campaigns, I swam over my own pool. And this is with my then fear of depth!
I began to learn English, alas, I had to throw the hall with a new schedule, but I know that I will return there again.
Everything calmed down for a while.
Part Four – "Light at the end of the tunnel"
Nothing is forever – then there was a lot of works, hopes that each would be a constant, permanent fale of expectations, again searches, again expectations, all again ..
Last place of work – from February to May of this year. Digital technique, from morning to evening, work, collection, audit after the end of the working day. And I liked it. I wanted to achieve a lot there, my bonfire began to flare up. After all, when more successful peers, having their own wheels and square meters, flash daily in front of the nose (although these are not absolute values, nevertheless it will be stupid to deny the realities of our world) no longer skid outmills in the style of “his parents are cool, help”. You begin to worry about this and sadly look at Pyap.
Together with the ambitions, my beliefs were also strong in me – no need to be confused, but you need to feel the price of yourself. You should not tough with all your might where it will not be appreciated – saving beads. A lot of nerves, time and effort were spent, before I once again reached where I got. And what did you count on, a student with a secondary – special? To the personal account and the young secretary that makes you … coffee? Service car F – class with a personal driver and vacation in the Maldives 2 times a year?
It was the last brick in my wall. Stop nourish illusions. Felt your price is good, but do not wait for the promised golden mountains. Understand what needs to have the above benefits and desire to possess them. Water does not flow under a lying stone, and never will.
Part Five – "Final"
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The final of my story, but not my story.
When I found out that the company cuts off all our earned bonuses, the decision, already ripening for more than a month in my manager head, was finally established, without the right to amnesty. To be left without bonuses means to stay without 2/3 of the planned earnings. This cannot be lowered. We must leave. Many wanted to leave, but they kept loans and rental housing. Loans … these slave shackles, which people voluntarily with pleasure throw on themselves. Life of loan. This is the trend of our time – have the fifth iPhone now, there is no time to wait – it will be out of place. Why save on a car – take a bank loan, everyone does it. Mantra – "So they do everything", "Yes, I am without overpayment", and t. D. But this is another topic, and in general – not my business.
So pleased the awakened rebellious impulses, when during the meeting I joined a small group of colleagues who announced the departure. I remembered Zhirinovsky with his "Stop to endure it," he did not dug up with difficulty. However, the feeling of deep moral satisfaction from the decision made without hesitation does not leave me now, a few days after what happened. I still have to go after the calculation, how great it is that I do not need to drag there daily and patiently chew unpleasantly smelling people from the hinterland with a semi -amicable look about how to take equipment on credit. No need to explain to grandmothers anymore that we do not have photocopy. It is not necessary to answer the drunks that we are not poured, but where they pour, we do not know. No need to listen to the complaints of the cattle that the Windows on the laptop flew, and explain that the warranty does not apply to the program. No need to overdo yourself in order to just come there.
I do not have false illusions for the next work, but now I know exactly what I want. I want to dump from here to permanent residence in Europe or the States, where I will not mow from the army and live from salaries to salary. To do this, I need to finish the language and save a small capital, for the subsequent move, and then on the list, but this is a completely different story.
Until the moment when something clicked in my head, and I decided to give this chamber stream of thoughts its outlines I sent the resume to potential employers. Responses will begin soon. But I will no longer grab the first "work" that came across ". I will no longer listen to the bosses’ tirads silently, agree to a penny salary and splash through the negativity of others.
What will come out of this later, but for now, a new chapter begins in my life ..
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My life is certainly not so sad, but my thoughts arose, I think this is normal for everyone at my age. But the last point about departure from the country confused me, because he reminded me of his recent. I will explain.
A couple of years ago, the thoughts of how everything is firing in Russia, and how good everything is in America and Europe, what cool travelers and t from there are all in Russia.D. Nephi contrast was reinforced by a constant stream of bad news and screams that it is time to sit on a tractor. I began to think about the future. Since that time, I have read many reports from people who moved abroad to live and, first of all, those who went there to receive their first higher education, which is closest to me. And after all this, I changed my opinion. But about everything in order.
First of all, take the tongue. It is critical https://fitzdarescasino.co.uk/ to know. I studied English, like the majority, so I paid attention to English -speaking countries: USA, Canada, England, Australia, New Zealand. All these countries with a good standard of living in comparison with Russia. And it is important to remember that these countries, and not only them, not against the arrival of educated specialists. T.e. Either you are very smart and pass through competitions to the university, or you have funds to pay for training, or you are moving from a local university under the student exchange program. Then you can study there and if there are successes to have a great chance to stay there to live there forever. If the university does not come out and you already work, then you can try to look for an employer who will provide you with a working visa and housing. Of course you need to be such a good employee for which they will move. Then, having worked for several years, you get citizenship. This is not a general scheme, but usually so. Once again, all countries need smart heads.
Now we take the standard version of the Russian dreamer who is not a demanded specialist, has no good education, does not have large means and wealthy relatives in a foreign country that will help him. Everything is simple here, if you cannot spin in this country and achieve something, then nothing will come out in another. A miracle will not happen. Having somehow received a visa and moved, it will be difficult to find a good job. Not only we look askance at visitors. The same attitude towards Mexicans in the USA, Turks in Germany, Africans in Italy, Latinos in Spain, Arabs in France. States in every possible way impede such migrants, and the population will be treated as a “cher from a mountain”. The choice of work will be small and is unlikely to imply career growth and a large salary. And after all, good health care, law and order, medicine, education are not taken from the air, the same taxes that, unlike Russia, are more competently controlled and spent. So while you are hunching like a donkey there, you can rise here if you have the same skills. Well, finding a wife and getting children will not be easier, and bringing it from Russia is more difficult.
And about Russia. Yes, everything is bad. Yes, worse than in civilized countries. But I think Russia has a future and potential. The country has every chance to become the best place to live for their own population. Yes, there is simply not a plowed field of enormous opportunities. And yes, it is difficult to raise the country, difficult and can not cope alone. I will not say something original, but you need to start with yourself and be an example. But this is not our way, so it seems that it is easier to dump. In fact, in the proverb “where it was born, there was useful” a very big meaning is hidden.
And a little statistics. They leave mainly up to 30 years, at 20-25. And this is indicative, because when a person finds his place, friends and family, and he has a real opportunity to move, he remains. Because everything is getting better and already holds something. And not everything is so bad. Therefore, you just need to find yourself and your place.
I do not pretend to be the absolute correctness of my thoughts, this is just what I deduced for myself from the information received. But the author, if you really want and think about moving, then you should think well, and very carefully study everything, otherwise you can just spend the very precious time that you are afraid to lose.
I think that if you see such a state of affairs here, then in the end you will see it in another place. Yourself and your worldview is more difficult to change than to move. Everything you wrote about, I often hear from others than I see myself. Maybe I was lucky, maybe it is.
In general, I already said everything I think, I just urge you to think carefully. Everyone has their own head and everyone is free to decide for himself what to do. And good luck in finding your place.
"Ubi Bene, Ibi Patria".
Oh, you want to write so much. I don’t know what to choose. I had everything shit in my life in my life. And at this wonderful moment I was taken into the army. Then I came – and everything ceased to be shit. The sun shone brighter, the world became kinder, shawarma tastes, and I found myself hobbies that I really like. I liked your statement about the "medium special". I don’t have him. A year in techies, a year at the university, go all the fuck, I don’t like it here, I am a loafer of mamaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. And so on. How cool it is to read such crap on blogs, maybe someday I will write. Maybe someone will read. Only I have Santa-Barbara wider, with a spoiled childhood, father-mudak, alkashi relatives, cattle-rayon and cattle-city, concepts, anashoy, alcohol, dullness of others and absolute confidence that God is, and there can be no objections. In short, tin. Why do people use the Internet so rarely in order to share such garbage? Why is it easier for them to come up with an ideal story of becoming themselves as an individual, and throw it into strangers, none of whom will believe in this nonsense? Dude – here is all so ** tumored as you! Well, or almost all! And each of us will assume that here he is … that he is … that these are the rest … but … I ..
I am sure that no one proudly raised head even noticed, you are a loser for them, nothing more.
Your values are worth nothing if you still think that you need to live like someone. Direct in a small apartment with a dull light bulb and without a wife. This will be equivalent to the fact that you will bury in a gorgeous mansion with a topmodel in an embrace. What is the difference? If you want to get up, achieve something in this life? First determine what..
I hit a lively description of the places of your work, I perfectly represent an unpleasant team, constant fines, disrespect and rudeness of the authorities.
And here it is also very much said.
Stop nourish illusions. Felt your price is good, but do not wait for the promised golden mountains. Understand what needs to have the above benefits and desire to possess them. Water does not flow under a lying stone, and never will.
Another thing is that everyone has different requests, of course. Who to buy the fifth iPhone-the main achievement, and accumulate someone for the apartment. Hence your possibilities to calculate.
In general, good luck in the new chapter of your life))
P.WITH. In general, here the reasoning is very philosophical, I did not expect to see this in the blogs of the game site.
You have spring exacerbation?
Something everyone has some depression began. Well, okay. Good luck in the States (unless, of course, it turns out)
You think people live differently abroad? Also for salaries. It looks like teenage idealism.
That I cannot have idols – because instead of equal to anyone to imitate it is better to find yourself, and to develop as much as possible, and not make it like ..
A set of words. Having an idol is not one of the points you listed. I said-their meaning is to make you do something. Inspiration.
Hehe, good luck, of course, but if you are not a one -legged black man, then you will have to plow even more with even fewer prospects. Therefore, if you are already pasting here, then you should accumulate enough money to immediately buy a place in the Senate. Or think about some US substitutes. There, local small businesses themselves cannot start.
Easier on corners, if you needed support words, pink hugs and tears of sympathy, then it was worth indicating this in advance, so as not to waste time on meaningless expressions with angry spraying of saliva later. If you are so interested in, then on this message you make a controversial impression in terms of age, I’m sorry, if you hurt so much, the post was not about the insult. I don’t know in what word of my comment it seemed to you that I say that we have no problem. The bottom line was that judging by your first post – and now on this (to which I write an answer) – foreign spaces are associated with Edem in clinically light colors, and the window directly has a pinkish shade on the glass.
I do not consider it rational to answer for each item, since most of them are just emotions.
This is fine. Without contradictions, life is impossible. Thanks to them, she has at least some sense! After all, this is fun – to be a contradiction … yourself o_o you know what picture I am waiting for: 3
I support Comrade Sanalambo, but I still want to add about our life. You do not like “a larger percentage of cattle, slave mentality … Reded streets, people without aspirations”. This, of course, is all with us, but do not think that when you come there you get into a fairy tale. The streets there, although not gone, are enough of their "cattle". They also live “loans” and dream of rush to the “third assistant senior supervisor”. In addition, here you know everything, you know the laws of society, you know people, you know how to behave, how to communicate, that you can say, that you can’t. Everything is simple and familiar here since childhood. And there everything is different, another mentality, another culture, other people, they operate with other concepts and moral values, you will have to rebuild. As a result, you get new bugs, and from the feature only partially removed old.
And then the pancake I blushed = (maybe well? I have Messi idol-this is the best football player in the world, after all.
Yes, I’m not talking about the state of affairs in Rashka (I myself want to dump in the future), about the phrase "where I will not live from salaries to salary". She is incorrect, in my opinion.
No, I’m still your fan. We even have three as many as Messusuki in the Volga region. And in schools they first teach that? That’s right, messages, messages and the messisuk language. And all why? Because I am the only Kalashnikov Automat Cluss in the field!
I personally have never had idols. More precisely, he had, but they did not exist in nature. I invented them. And in different years they were different. Scientists, football players, game developers.